The Show Must Go On

Posted: July 24, 2013 in Uncategorized

Sir Elton John has revealed he is ‘lucky to be alive’ after he was struck down by a bout of appendicitis, forcing him to cancel upcoming gigs.
The 66-year-old I’m Still Standing legend has cancelled many of his European tour dates, after he was left crippled with stomach pain. Tests soon showed he had suffered a dangerous appendix abscess.
‘I’m lucky to be alive,’ he admitted. ‘I was a ticking time bomb. I guess I could have died at any time.’
‘I feel so lucky and so grateful to be alive. I played nine gigs and the White Tie and Tiara Summer Ball in agony,’ he added .

As you may be aware there is an annual ceremony called the Darwin Awards. This is a celebration of the terminally stupid and is given posthumously to people whose seriously misguided Eureka moment ends in their untimely and completely avoidable death. Examples of past winners are the man who wanted to demonstrate his unbreakable glass window on the 24th floor by running at it and going straight through it and the man who was convinced he could win a fight against a lion and was subsequently consumed by the animal when he put his theory to the test.

Mr John’s effort here is surely worthy of honorary mention at the next ceremony with only the failure at the final hurdle robbing him of a prize.

Generally speaking when someone experiences excruciating pain of unknown origin, that is, not from losing a chunk of thigh to a shark or being dragged headlong into a thresher, their first instinct is not to dust off the lamé suit and belt out a few insipid ballads on the old Joanna. No at the first sign of it they usually hot foot it to the nearest medical professional to get it seen to.

The show must go on…not if yer fuckin’ dead it won’t.

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